Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
