I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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