There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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