Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
