we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
