its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
