one two three fourrrrnication!
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
