Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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