You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
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