Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
this beer tastes like vomit already
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize
