Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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