Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
