Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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