Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
