singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Randomize
