Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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