just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
