hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
