the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
This gyro tastes like lonliness
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
