dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
How drunk are you?
Completed.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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