He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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