i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
