I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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