He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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