You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Randomize
