So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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