You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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