So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After tacos, we're chasing women.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize