Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
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