you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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