Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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