so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
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