just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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