sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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