i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
