i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
