covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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