"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
