That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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