WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize