beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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