i already hear my dad disowning me
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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