Don't you send me to vm
return my video game
Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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