therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
