I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
