You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
