I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
