I'm really into asian looking animals
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
