Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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