if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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